This entry is dedicated to my good buddy, Jay. I had the privilege of staying at his home this week and he was more than hospitable--and his cooking was like going to a different restaurant every night! Jay, we'll never forget this incident--and This Man will never forget you. TGH


"I washed it and set it near the window so it could dry, " my buddy, Jay explained this afternoon, while pointing to the spot of the nightstand where he'd supposedly left his Bam realistic dildo.
First, allow This Man to tell you that this isn't a dildo that one looses easily. Yet here we were, perplexed on where it could possibly be all while attempting to retrace Jay's steps on where he could've left it. So Jay and This Man went about searching for the massive hunk of plastic, amazed that such a thing could be misplaced. It wasn't in the bathroom, the kitchen or the living. We didn't see it near his desk, his bedroom or the backyard. It was GONE!
"Shit, " This Man asked, exasperated. "Is it still in your ass?"
"No, but this is certainly one of those times when the old saying, 'If it was up your ass, you'd know' would really be true." Jay remarked while looking on the side of his dresser. Once, during our stint at playing detective, we even considered the possibility that maybe someone could've come into the house and took it. But then there was nothing else missing.
We truly could not find this dildo!
Finally, Jay took another look behind his dresser and found the thing lodged between the dresser and the window. Apparently, it had rolled off the dresser and got caught in the curtains. We laughed it off and but the real jem was when Jay explained, "There aren't too many people outside of us who would find themselves searching for a dildo...but then there aren't too many people like me who would use one so much that it needs to be washed and dried!"

Mahalo.